either be evil, or give a damn

i watch a lot of documentaries, and i do a lot of reading about world news and current events, from a lot of alternative sources. anyone who knows a little bit about these things knows that things are really difficult to bear, everywhere.  really, really difficult...

and, things in my own city are, as you know....very, very challenging.  i feel like the people here are born naturally with some of the lowest group-iq's that i've ever experienced.  the things i see here are embarrassing to humankind.  and then when i watch a documentary or read something ridiculous, i become ignited.  i get doubly frustrated and i want to start nuking.  

but i know, that's not the kind of person that i'd prefer to be.  i have to pretty much choose to go one way or the other.  either i have to try at all times to be my coolest, or i can be just angry.  pissed about everything stupid that a lot of people are, and become that type of person.  i really don't think there's a whole lot of room for grey. i've tried that, and it doesn't work.  because if i'm going to be pissed, i'm going to be pissed at everyone and every thing.  and if i'm going to hate, i'm going to hate everyone.  and that last part has forced me to put my own foot into my mouth way too many times.   

add-on....
i've brought my gaming life into my digital-life, i'm @miniscatt on twitter, in addition to being @jtwilliams1920

and, my other blog here is, http://therenegadefilmcircuit.blogspot.com/ 

here's my FB fan page, https://www.facebook.com/jtwilliams.org

and my personal site is, www.jtwilliams.org

i'm updating the last one after i leave here, so please check in in a little while, then i'll be done :o)  (5/9/2014)

thanks!  i hope i'll see you around

--An Apology--

i apologize in advance if i ever offend anyone.  but, this is...tell the man to suck it.  and that includes holding back and conventialism.  i gotta get it out.  and i think it's kind of interesting.  my environment really influences me.  Some places, like LA or Busan, that works really well.  in places in Atlanta, I have to reconfigure my whole outlook because if i allowed my surroundings/city to do the exact same as somewhere like LA, i'd stay really pissed for a long time.  LA=no eczema, no allergies, no hood-life, ocean, mountain, beautiful weather, progressive, interesting people.  ATL=sweaty eczema, a sheet of pollen and scratching my face out 7/12 months of the year, land-locked crazy heat and humidity, backwards hood-life EVERYWHERE....a city of people who didn't get the memo that slavery was over.

And it's not just the black hood-people, although they get on most people's nerves.  not just white or 'other' people, but they annoy us brown people!  believe me.  my black friends have HUGE problems with them.  but, this lady that i was sitting next to, white lady.  her friend comes into the coffee shop, comes over and starts talking to her about a murder that happened yesterday, nearby.  she says, there was a kid shot dead in the street.  the first question from the lady next to me was, 'black kid?' then she starts talking about gangs.  lady, you haven't seen gangs until you've seen LA.  but that's cool.  ignorant stuff from everyone.  and then there are the small pockets of cool people, i live for them in my social life.